HAAAYY go Ate it's ya birthday lol.. I'm glad you found out who that punk was...

That's another thing everyone in our family has in common; we're all so cocky.  We get it from our parents.  UGhHH.. We've gotten so used to them that we're becoming them.  They always lead from one subject to another when we're in trouble, so 9 out of ten times, they win the argument.  We go from me throwing up to "What you think you can live on your own now?"  We went from me in the bathroom on the phone to "What do you wana marry this guy?"  And now we wind up doing it to each other and our boyfriends and our children and on and on we go now.

Finals weren't all that bad, though lately I've decided not to take choir again.  Singing isn't my thing.  I've wasted 15 years doing it thinking I can.  When really, why spend the rest of my life loving and hoping I can do something I obviously really can't?  Sigh...That's just one of the bad sides of being spoiled.

My French teacher is..hmm I dunno how to explain... not smart enough for the job...

She gave us a study guide and allowed us one notecard for the final.  The final was pretty easy in the beginning, but I really think she made the study guide before looking through the real test.  It's pissing the hell outta me.  I listed everything I didn't know, and most of the test was the part she never told us to study for.  Oh yeah everything was on it EXCEPT::

1. The numbers 1-100 she made us study
2. The colors she made us study
3. The seasons she made us study
4. The days of the week she made us study
5. The months of the year she made us study
6. The descriptions of people she made us study

I could go on.  And the worst part of it was that my parents still don't believe the problem isn't me.  Honestly, yeah, I talk in class, I'm loud in class.  But I follow her stupid rules.  I can never hear or understand what she's saying.  From what I understand, she failed people for stupid reasons and people still say she's a bad teacher.  If my parents really called her, she'd make it sound as if I'm the one who isn't cooperating.  She's not teaching right.  And what my parents don't understand either is that the only reason she's the French teacher at my school is because they can't find a French teacher.  It's so hard to find any.  My parents aren't getting it.

Last night ** *** told me to take care of CKay today.  I answered "Mmmhmm," as I was getting my stuff out of the room.  And from then on, the conversation tangled into "Why do you keep talking like a black girl?!  YES ***."  I told him "Black girls don't talk like that...white girls do." And still... My *** kept confronting me because I hated my white-washed-trynna-be-black community, and then it was because he thinks I'm trying to act black when:

1. I'm not standing straight [when really my stomach hurts or my feet hurt]
2. When I'm listening to 'rap' [when it's Mariah Carey or even christian which he doesn't care about]
3. When I'm not talking right [it's not my fault my white friends influenced me to say OKAY when I'm mad.  and you can't blame me when I'm getting HIT and SCREAMING]

I'm really irritated.  Everything we talk about is an argument.  It's like he gets jealous at everything, and he doesn't even care about my birthday.

I'm thankful for what he does, I really am, but he needs to quit it.

I'm so spoiled.

After watching and reading The Virgin Suicides, the disturbing story rocked my mind.

If someone wrote a story and made a movie about my family... I wonder what they'd say.  I wonder what the world would think.  It would probably sound a little something like this...

...The oldest was Angela.  She had the hardest past with her parents out of the three, growing up to become the smartest most beautiful sister among the rest.  The way she put her words together made her sound so brilliant.  The way she matched her clothes together made her seem so classy.  She was truly a kid at heart.  She had a creative mind which expressed itself in everything she did.  She sat up straight, walked straight, and had vocals that could take her places.

The middle child was Melissa.  She was fat.  Her goal was to become a singer, although choked on her first choir final.  She had a piece of mind that was somewhat crazy.  She really wasn't the prettiest of the three, but hey.  It didn't matter who gave their heart to her.  She'd take it, and no matter who she 'loves', she never gave up her whole heart to anyone.  Half the time she'd be making people laugh, but the rest of the time, all she could do was bitch about how awful her life was.  It was true that anyone who loved her must have seen beyond a lot of shit.

The youngest was Charysma, who was one of the favorites out of two.  She had the cutest smile with the cutest voice, and a mix of the good and the bad of her older sisters.

Despite their differences, all of them had a short fuse.  They'd get irritated easily....~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You understand?  You see.. if anyone wrote a story about anyone of us, they'd make us sound like people who had seperate powers to make a justice league.

Thanx Elizaaa

lol..THANX CHRISTINE AND CHRISTINE FOR THE BALLOONS..

I had a bad one-day-after-birthday.

First.. Lyana BITCHES at me about dumb stuff.  I don't really care about her best friend or whatever. I don't even care about Evan.  Go ahead go out with Evan.

And theeen... ugh.. i don't know if I should say I screwed up our choir final, or two other people did.

Oh yahh the 7th..REMEMBER.. heh heh.. soo farr its guna bee..for SHORE

stef, jay, erik, lesley, zorana, all themmm at church, hmm lets see hurr.... rochelle christineeeeeeeeeeee who else?!?! i cant recall...

I deleted my Findapix profile because it wasn't worth it.

Kuya and Kuya Raj were right about the low self esteem thinger.

"He's soo sexual!" -- Ania

Hmm now I'm interested in seeing Joan of Ark with Claire Daines in it ever since Ate told me about it.

ania and me and sharon!!

evan dedicated his luv for me for my bday..sigh..i love batman tho.

I woke up this morning....

15 YEARS OLD!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MEEEEEEE REMEMBER BALLOONS TOMORROW FOR MY CHOIR FINAL =^.^=

I love my mommy!!  She paid for a lunch at Chevy's with my church.. man.. me and lesley and zorana ate the same thing.

THANX mommy for the dvd/cd/mp3 player!! mua yayyyyy
ckay thanx for the gum lol

yehh took my birthday pooey

Aww, today was filled with so many surprises.

It is true that when God won’t let you have something, He has way more restored for you.

This morning, my mom and I had decided to invite my church to Chevy’s for my birthday.  My mom paid for the whole thing.  We had BABY BACK RIBS ooooh goooshh.. And we had the ooey-gooey-chewy sundae.  Zorana and Lesley planned everyone to sing for me three times, but on the final time, the employees at Chevy’s dropped the sombrero on my head by surprise and sang giving us the sundaes.  OMGosh.  I almost cried it was slightly embarrassing but hey.  I’ve always wanted one since fourth grade =^o.o^=.  My mom convinced me what she got me was better than an MP3 player, and I couldn’t think about what it was.  Surprisingly, everyone else’s guess were closer than mine, and I love mommy for it.  It is true.  But I need an MP3 player for school =< srry.  But what she got me is greater when I’m not at school.

welcome these cool people::

ohn0itsnate <-- nate nate heard so much aboutchu from myas page
MaTtHeW_fEiNeR <-- matts new page
i_Love_PHOking <-- cool kid who saved me first cooool beeeans

"Gotta act quickly you and I, we fall in love so many reasons why" -- Amerie

Today I saw Just Married with my mommy and CKay.  =^.^=

I forgot to teach everyone who reads my xangurr monsturrr that getting married and being in love means that you realize there's more than just love.  Being with someone you love and actually THINK you'll spend the rest of your life with means that you have MORE than love and a friendship, that you go beyond it.  You need to realize that you'll be in love SOMETIMES, and sometimes, you just won't.  But you have to stay together through it all.

Good stuff huh!

Dear Lord,

are you there?  Listenin to my little prayer I don't know exactly what to say.  I've been told that you love me, hear me when I call would help me if I fall I should let you have your way.  What I guess I'm trying to say is that I need you in my life Cuz I know I'm tired of living in the past.  I would like to take a chance on a change down deep inside, I believe that this is one that's gonna last so here's my heart.. Its been broken its been wounded but I'll give it all to you if you will love me.  Here's my life if you want it you can have it I will give it all to you because you love me, your love is everything I need.. --Out of Eden

One more day!

Congratulations Anne on your new baby!!!

How is she?!

Yay she was born 2 days before my birthday!!!

I’m soo happy for you!!!

Remember that God loves you unconditionally.. and He gave it all for you.  What you see is not always what you get because sometimes you'll get more than you expected.  =^.^=

aww MAN I can't believe I forgot..

THANX ATE AND PROFIT FOR THE TREAT YESTERDAY it was great.  Really REALLY.  Hope we can do it again sometime hah.